HOW I EXPERIENCED THE CARD-SCAM OF A LIFETIME
My Lucky Day(?)
"Two Queen cards and one Blank. Two Queen cards and one Blank. Pick the blank card and take the phone. Blank one my brother, DON'T touch the queen, Blank one my sister, DON'T touch the Queen!..."
It was a hot September noon in Enugu, Nigeria. Year 2015. This dude had three cards on a table along the road to my destination. I was going to eat lunch after 6 hectic hours in Mark Twain Pharmacy where I was undergoing industrial training. People seemed interested in whatever the man was doing, so I closed in to take a look. After all, students are supposed to be inquisitive.
The man showed everyone the three cards, two Queens and a blank one, and then placed them face-down on the table. The Android Phone prize was also lying on the table beside the cards. He maneuvered the three cards with his hands while repeating the simple rule of the game, alongside other untypable jargons: "Two Queen cards and one blank. Pick the blank one and take the phone. Blank one my brother, DON'T touch the queen..." Eyes followed the blank card as he swiftly slipped it under and passed it over the other cards repeatedly. Finally he stopped. I was sure i knew where the blank card was.
"Who can pick the blank card?" It turned out one had to pay N1,000 to make a selection. "Make I hear", I mused to myself. Someone volunteered. He dropped his cash and made for his blank card. "Nooooo...!!!" The excited crowd chorused as he picked the wrong one. I couldn't believe his dumbness. I couldn't understand how anyone would miss the blank card. There were only two cards left now and I was so sure which was the right one.
"Pick the blank card and take the phone!", the man urged on, having pocketed the "dumb" dude's N1,000. Someone else indicated interest but was turned down. "You don chop me before" (You have won before), the man told him. This was too good to be true. I kept calm till this point because I distrusted these street scam artists, but if someone had really WON BEFORE, this might be real!
Fidgeting, I brought a minty N1,000 note out of my wallet. It has stayed there for a good long time. My long-budgeted new set of leather slippers can wait a bit longer. I was about to get a new Android phone. Maybe I should sell it and buy more clothing, or give it to Amanda back at the Pharmacy. I like her...
"Pay and pick the blank card", the dude's voice startled me back to reality. It was the one on the left, 100% sure. I dropped the money and made for the card.. "Noooo...!!!", I also got the good old response. Whatever. Turns out the uneducated masses haven't the I.Q I perpetually gave them credit for. I flipped my card over to reveal the face. What?! This can't be true! The blank card suddenly had a Queen staring at me in disdain. But...
The game started afresh like I was inexistent. My money was gone. I gazed randomly at the road and my eyes met a woman's. She had the look of the miracle queen I had met on my blank card. Disdain. Contempt. Where did I get it wrong??
The man was shuffling again. He does not even make any efforts to hide the lucky card! I once again knew where the blank one was once he was done. As before, the first person was wrong, bringing the options down to two. I still knew where the blank was. The next person dropped his money and picked, yet again. The WRONG card!!! I saw the look on his face. Same as mine when I lost. He was startled, dazed, confused.
Then it dawned on me.
This was an organized con group. Some members of the audience were there to urge the target to make a move. "You don chop me before". Trust me, no one has ever won! It was more like a dramatic display. And what's more? The process was metaphysical. There was a diabolical underplay such that no matter how sure you are, once under the spotlight, you'll pick the wrong card. This explains why the audience was always disappointed at the picker, because they always knew better! How did I condescend this low?
"If you don give me N1,000 before, come here", said the scammer. What??! Is he going to return at least half of my money? As I made to move closer, probably under another spell, someone dragged me out of the thronging crowd.
"Guy you dey mad?" I was dazed.
"You no know say na gambling be this?" I knew it was more than just gambling.
"You better carry your phone comot here before you lose am!".
I knew it. The juju con dude was going to make us bet further with our non-cash belongings.
I thanked my guardian angel and continued with my journey to the eatery. Not long after, I met the frowning woman from before. The one whose look corresponded to that of my miracle queen. The look of contempt deepened. " Dem for chop you wella today!"(they would have extorted you to death if you stayed on), she hissed. I smiled that awkward smile of shame.
N1,000 gone. Even worse, I had been under the influence of juju for some lousy seconds. I breathed a short prayer and proceeded with life. That was one experience I wouldn't forget in a hurry. Moreover, it could have been much worse. I could have lost my phone, wristwatch, shirt and trousers if I hadn't scrambled when I did.
My lucky day indeed.
"Two Queen cards and one Blank. Two Queen cards and one Blank. Pick the blank card and take the phone. Blank one my brother, DON'T touch the queen, Blank one my sister, DON'T touch the Queen!..."
It was a hot September noon in Enugu, Nigeria. Year 2015. This dude had three cards on a table along the road to my destination. I was going to eat lunch after 6 hectic hours in Mark Twain Pharmacy where I was undergoing industrial training. People seemed interested in whatever the man was doing, so I closed in to take a look. After all, students are supposed to be inquisitive.
The man showed everyone the three cards, two Queens and a blank one, and then placed them face-down on the table. The Android Phone prize was also lying on the table beside the cards. He maneuvered the three cards with his hands while repeating the simple rule of the game, alongside other untypable jargons: "Two Queen cards and one blank. Pick the blank one and take the phone. Blank one my brother, DON'T touch the queen..." Eyes followed the blank card as he swiftly slipped it under and passed it over the other cards repeatedly. Finally he stopped. I was sure i knew where the blank card was.
"Who can pick the blank card?" It turned out one had to pay N1,000 to make a selection. "Make I hear", I mused to myself. Someone volunteered. He dropped his cash and made for his blank card. "Nooooo...!!!" The excited crowd chorused as he picked the wrong one. I couldn't believe his dumbness. I couldn't understand how anyone would miss the blank card. There were only two cards left now and I was so sure which was the right one.
"Pick the blank card and take the phone!", the man urged on, having pocketed the "dumb" dude's N1,000. Someone else indicated interest but was turned down. "You don chop me before" (You have won before), the man told him. This was too good to be true. I kept calm till this point because I distrusted these street scam artists, but if someone had really WON BEFORE, this might be real!
Fidgeting, I brought a minty N1,000 note out of my wallet. It has stayed there for a good long time. My long-budgeted new set of leather slippers can wait a bit longer. I was about to get a new Android phone. Maybe I should sell it and buy more clothing, or give it to Amanda back at the Pharmacy. I like her...
"Pay and pick the blank card", the dude's voice startled me back to reality. It was the one on the left, 100% sure. I dropped the money and made for the card.. "Noooo...!!!", I also got the good old response. Whatever. Turns out the uneducated masses haven't the I.Q I perpetually gave them credit for. I flipped my card over to reveal the face. What?! This can't be true! The blank card suddenly had a Queen staring at me in disdain. But...
The game started afresh like I was inexistent. My money was gone. I gazed randomly at the road and my eyes met a woman's. She had the look of the miracle queen I had met on my blank card. Disdain. Contempt. Where did I get it wrong??
The man was shuffling again. He does not even make any efforts to hide the lucky card! I once again knew where the blank one was once he was done. As before, the first person was wrong, bringing the options down to two. I still knew where the blank was. The next person dropped his money and picked, yet again. The WRONG card!!! I saw the look on his face. Same as mine when I lost. He was startled, dazed, confused.
Then it dawned on me.
This was an organized con group. Some members of the audience were there to urge the target to make a move. "You don chop me before". Trust me, no one has ever won! It was more like a dramatic display. And what's more? The process was metaphysical. There was a diabolical underplay such that no matter how sure you are, once under the spotlight, you'll pick the wrong card. This explains why the audience was always disappointed at the picker, because they always knew better! How did I condescend this low?
"If you don give me N1,000 before, come here", said the scammer. What??! Is he going to return at least half of my money? As I made to move closer, probably under another spell, someone dragged me out of the thronging crowd.
"Guy you dey mad?" I was dazed.
"You no know say na gambling be this?" I knew it was more than just gambling.
"You better carry your phone comot here before you lose am!".
I knew it. The juju con dude was going to make us bet further with our non-cash belongings.
I thanked my guardian angel and continued with my journey to the eatery. Not long after, I met the frowning woman from before. The one whose look corresponded to that of my miracle queen. The look of contempt deepened. " Dem for chop you wella today!"(they would have extorted you to death if you stayed on), she hissed. I smiled that awkward smile of shame.
N1,000 gone. Even worse, I had been under the influence of juju for some lousy seconds. I breathed a short prayer and proceeded with life. That was one experience I wouldn't forget in a hurry. Moreover, it could have been much worse. I could have lost my phone, wristwatch, shirt and trousers if I hadn't scrambled when I did.
My lucky day indeed.
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